The Art of Wasting Time

Dolce Far Niente - John William Waterhouse

I have often thought myself to be a Jack-of-all-Trades, the silent "Master of None", always quite audible to my mind. I was an all rounder at school (except sports which I forgoed as soon as I realised that my lack of co-ordination, read concentration, meant that I would have to work extra hard to be just average.

Since leaving University I have walked through my professional career believing that I am decent at most things I try my hand to, but not especially exceptional at anything. I have since realised that this is perhaps an ingrained mental belief in “not being good enough” that finds safety in hippity hopping between skills and completing them with passable ability rather than stepping out of the safe box and owning brilliance in something or other.

It is a classic trait of insecurity and something I am now trying to rectify. In leaving a traditional, full time, salaried job, I am having to learn to fight against all these learnt instincts. My life and career is now what I make of it and I need to believe I am the best person to do X, Y, Z.

This is especially true in the novel and play that I am writing. For the best friends of Jack-of-all-Trades are Unfinished Projects, Procrastination and the skill of Wasting Time.

The amount of times I have said I wanted to do something whether that be enter a particular writing competition, join a rowing club, a drama club, do the three peaks challenge etc and not completed it are innumerable. Sometimes it has taken me three hours to make a phone call to, for example, the dentist to make an appointment. My talent in time wasting is exemplary.

Walking

Walking is my thing.

It's the thing that I do when I want to think, when I have problems or worries that I just can't solve. It's almost meditational to me... because generally whatever I''m struggling with works around and around in my head and some sort of solution is thrust forward.

My father takes a long bath whenever he is fussing over a conundrum, I walk.

Walking also helps me to really feel in the moment. To feel small and insignificant and to watch the world work around me, it reminds me that I'm not at the centre of it. The familiar buzz of humanity through towns; the shouting, laughter, irritation seeps through. It earths me. The rolling hills and trees do the same.

It's something about the nature of the rhythm of footsteps perhaps, perhaps they move unknowingly to the beat of your heart, to your breath and make you feel grounded and restful.

I don't know, all I do know is that it soothes me. And I can do it anywhere.

Whatever your soothing ritual is, or however you problem solve, be sure to include it in your daily routine. It is good for your soul, don't you know.