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Thursday 22 May 2014

1928


Today is voting day in some or other elections in the UK... Many people aren't sure what. So far really it's been the Farage show and the twittersphere has hijacked the hashtag #WhyImVotingUKIP, which personally I find hilarious.

I'm currently on my way to vote which is to delay me to an engagement drinks and getting that much needed glass of Thursday wine and is rather irksome. 

In my larger group of friends, I reckon about 15% have actually voted. This winds me up no end. Here are my five reasons why everyone should be voting:

1) People fought hard for it


It wasn't until 1928 in Britain that everyone could vote. Poor, rich, male, female etc etc. people died fighting for the right in this country. That deserves respect.

2) People round the world are still fighting and dying. 


Read Aung San Suu Kyi's books and her life story. She was under house arrest for twenty years in Burma and yet once released, she went straight back to politics.

3) You can't complain if you're not voting. 


Care about where your tax money goes, the rights of x, y and z? The future for your eventual kids? You have to be invested to complain.

4) You don't have to agree with anything and everything


If you don't like anybody, read a little,vote for the one that you may have a few policies you agree with or an independent but for God's sake, vote. Apathy says absolutely nothing.

5) Actions speak louder than words. 




So register NOW and make sure you vote next time.

Tuesday 20 May 2014

I Love You: Secret Theatre Show 5


Basically, I am not really sure what I am going to do when the Secret Theatre series is over and I don't even know when that will be because it's all secret and that. I have developed a full blown fangirl obsession with the shows and the company. It's a proper crush... After I saw Show 5 last Thursday, I proceeded to:

1).Tweet the Lyric immediately and asked them for the soundtrack so I could play it on my iPod on my commute

2). Google, Google, Google for signs of Show 6? And for news of the tour...

3). Stalk all the actors and actresses I could find on Twitter and try and find out which ones were single/might want to make new friends/would potentially slip me a tongue when pissed/stalkable in local bars as I only work in Chiswick. ;) #lol Because I love them all.

4). Also stalk the writers..as a writer and a wannabe playwright.. I need some of what they're drinking.

5). Work out when I could possibly see it again...

6). Dance to Proud Mary until I fell over


You see everything changed for me after Show 5... After I had been to see Show 3 and Show 4 (read the reviews, they are pretty sensible compared to this one) I knew I was a Secret Theatre convert and that now I had to see every one. I was even annoyed about the fact I missed one and two... (Though just mildly irked, now I am enraged).

 

A Series of Increasingly Impossible Acts - what Show 5 is otherwise known as - has left me all teenage and trembly and happy and light. It's not as emotionally powerful as Show 3 or as clever as Show 4 but it taps in to humanity and fear and failure and friendship and love. 

Show 5 is set in the Lyric rehearsal room and every night there is a different protagonist... a typical Secret Theatre twist which I believe (here is a tiny bit of sensible critique stuff here) must keep it alive and kicking every night, full of the energy of the unknown... The audience pick it out, so they can't even cheat... not that they would need to as they're all so talented (I told you, massive fangirl)


My protagonist was the fabulous Katherine Pearce (Kat) who I knew was talented and able to transform herself, from the previous two productions. In this, she was I imagine a played up version of herself. Everyone else was supporting in more or less roles. Everything centered round Kat and her trials, tribulations and difficult times in life and love and friendship. 

Some of the sketches were more narrative: sex, first kiss/ first date, falling in and out of love and being destroyed by it, cheating. Others were more metaphoric or symbolic: an obstacle course that was undertaken several times throughout the play at first alone and then helped by the whole cast; an odd sort of shrink session; a wrestling game involving fears and stripping. A shiveringly warming version of Sincerely by The Moonglows sung by Hammed Annimashaun, a dance to Proud Mary which I really had to force myself not to join in with... Each little excerpt bringing tears, laughter and recognition from the audience.


90 minutes shot by and I wanted more and I wanted to see all of the cast members take the protagonist role, because I felt like they were giving us a slice of themselves and a themselves that everyone in the company knew too. The Secret Theatre group have created something together.. and all these individuals have joined to create and perform it and they've got to know each other.


When I was a child and teenager, I used to be in all the school plays... used to love the rehersals, the comraderie, the thrill and then after the final performance for at least a week after I would cry and cry and feel miserable that I could never get that feeling back or work and act with those people again - not in that exact same circumstance... It was like a small piece of magic and then gone. Then after a week I'd forget about it.

I hope these lot never do.

Secret Theatre Show 5, The Lyric, Hammersmith

Now until May 29th


Here is the Soundtrack for Show 5


Here are The Secret Theatre Crew:


Nadia Albina @NadiaAlbina -
Hammed Animashaun @HamzDaActor
Cara Horgan
Leo Bill @SerpicLeo
Matti Houghton
Adelle Leonce @AdelleLeonce
Katherine Pearce @KattiAnn
Billy Seymour @SeymourBilly
Sergo Vares
Steven Webb @MrStevieWebb

Love them all <3

Images are (c) The Secret Theatre Group

Tuesday 13 May 2014

Martine, Shaken and Stirred at The Finborough


The first thing I will say is that this production at one of my favourite theatres in London is only on for another three days. There are five performances left including a Saturday matinee and the final one on Saturday 17th May. This final performance is the only one that has seats left apparently. So, I'm going to make this a quick review because otherwise I won't finish it tonight and then people might not have time to see it... which would be a shame as it's haunting and sad and lovely too. So apologies in advance for the rambling and if it makes no sense.. sorry it does in my tired brain.

I would start by saying that many of the productions I see are very, very modern and the scripts are new and sparse, the narrative often just a shadow amongst dissonance. Sometimes I find myself straining to comprehend anything about these plays, but a desire to be very very loud and very very new. Not always the most impressive thing.


This is Martine, written in 1922 by the French playwright, Jean-Jacques Bernard; the script this production are working to was translated in 1985 for The National Theatre by John Fowles. There has not been a production of it in London since. This version is fabulously directed by Tom Littler of Primavera Productions and my local, Theatre 503.

It is a simple story, boy returning from war meets country girl, boy and girl fall in "love" among fields and hay, boy leaves girl for cleverer, more pulled-together ex-fiancee. Country girl is heartbroken and left alone and married off to a bullish man she hates, well aware that she is enslaved to a life of misery and infants.


Yet is far from simple too. 

Bernard was the leader of the movement of the art of the unexpressed in theatre and this translates easily to his actors in 2014. The performances are so subtle yet emotional that one can not really believe it. The women especially impressed: Hannah Murray as country girl, Martine plays her with delicacy and eroticism and awe whilst still being jovial enough for a giggle or two. She switches from barely concealed passion to resigned numbness, always with the audience in her heart. Leila Crerar as the fiancee is such a witty, pretty hoot that you understand why Julien (Barnaby Sax) chooses her. I wanted to be her best friend. Susan Penhaligon as the matriarch of the play whom everyone else revolves around is warm and engaging and yet quietly cruel in the end.


Essentially I thought two things as I left the theatre, the first is that everyone loves Martine, needs her, wants her around and she runs on after them all. Even Jeanne the sparky fiancee craves her company whilst her (eventual) husband is at work and then cannot bear once he returns. They all leave Martine in the end, except her husband who loves her but can give her none of the romance or glamour that she enjoyed for a few short weeks with Julien. But a little part of me wanted to shake her... at the end.. even though I know how difficult and different it was in those times for women. A little part of me wanted her to scream at the end and throw them all under the ship.


The second was exactly that... as women in the West, look how far we've come and how much we have. For most of us, marriage is no longer our only choice, stuck our entire lives thinking about two weeks one summer a million years ago when we loved a boy.. who married someone else. 

And yet... and yet.. nothing has changed really, as there will be unrequited love and love between different social groups or "intelligent levels" or interests. Some people will always leave others and some people will still marry for convenience. These days we are just LOUDER about it.


If you get the chance to see Martine, I wouldn't miss it. It's a lesson in subtlety and fleeting love and sacrifice and the acting is commendable. I'd book future plays purely on the merit of those three female performances.


Martine at the Finborough Theatre until 17th May

118 Finborough Road
London
SW10 9ED



Images (c) Finborough Theatre

Mean, Mean Girl: Lessons Learnt


Two weeks ago was the tenth anniversary of Mean Girls, a film which defined my late teenage years. I remember seeing it in the cinema and laughing out loud at the aptness of the observations and admiring Tina Fey's fearless humour. I don't remember anyone saying vagina in a teen movie before. Lohan was pre-rehab and Rachel McAdams had yet to be obsessed over by Ryan Gosling (who was he), no one knew Amanda Seyfried could sing. 

At our final school "prom"  when some friends and I were escaping from the five boys that had turned up (#allgirlsschoolproblems) and having a cheeky cigarette on a bench outside, I remember a girl from our year coming up to my two friends and I and saying after a while "You guys are kind of like the mean girls". 

I took this as a massive compliment. Who wouldn't want to be likened to those sophisticated American, follicly-gifted stuff of teenage dreams. In fact I don't think she was trying to mean.. And I don't think I was that much of a bitch at school. The truth though is that I loved been likened to attractive and popular girls, because despite my above-average conscience for a teenager, those things are what I strived for. I would have a very different attitude if someone said that to me now. I just don't want to be a Mean Girl any more, however much I might try and get down with the youth by talking about "ma bitches", on social media.

In reality, my generation learnt and in some cases (age 28), could still learn a lot from the truths of Mean Girls and this is perhaps why, it has stood the test of time unlike so many other "teen movies".

Here are the lessons that I learned:

1) "Calling somebody else fat won't make you any skinnier. Calling someone stupid doesn't make you any smarter. And ruining Regina George's life definitely didn't make me any happier. All you can do in life is try to solve the problem in front of you."


An early lesson for me... in fact one that, without sounding sanctimonious, I never really needed to learn. Perhaps this was because between the ages of 13-15, I was a full-blown geek/loser. I liked to read, I liked to do well at school revelling in the praise and the As. 

Reaping the usual teasing from this, I knew I never wanted to make anyone else feel like that. Why would berating and bullying others make you feel better about yourself. It is a quick fix that leaves one sick and regretful and possibly more insecure once the buzz wears off. This however is still a common tactic employed by the world over and the media in particular, mostly towards women. 

We need to solve our own internal problems, not try to drag others down to the lowness we may be feeling inside.

2) "Janis: [reading list the major cliques in high school] You got your freshmen, ROTC guys, preps, J.V. jocks, Asian nerds, Cool Asians, Varsity jocks Unfriendly black hotties, Girls who eat their feelings, Girls who don't eat anything, Desperate wannabes, Burnouts, Sexually active band geeks,
[a picture of herself and Damian come on screen]
Janis: the greatest people you will ever meet, and the worst. Beware of the plastics."



There are always cliques, though perhaps less pronounced than at the archetypal movie-version of an American high school and there are always mean girls.

Just remember, the only person who can really define you is yourself. Some people are always going to place a ring around your neck and label you as "xxxx", whether that is good or bad, but you know the truth. Avoid the mean girls if you can, but more importantly, respect who you are and what you stand for and you'll be fine. 

3) "Ex-boyfriends are off-limits to friends. That’s just, like, the rules of feminism.” 

Interesting definition of feminism aside, this is about honesty when it comes to men and women. Relationship are hard enough without worrying that one of your "friends" is going to make it harder. Having said that I don't believe that if you have let some one go to fly off into the universe without any issues that you should ban them from any relationships with your friends or acquaintances. However we should always be mindful of others and honest from the beginning. This way drama and hurt is usually avoided.

If you have no interest in someone anymore, don't stop them from being happy with another. On the otherside, don't assume someone is fine with you moving in on their ex without asking them. Basically this is another treat others how you would like to be treated, respect people. Weirdness will pass.
4) "There are two kinds of evil people in this world. Those who do evil stuff and those who see evil stuff being done and don’t try to stop it.”

I was not brave as a teenager, I struggled enough to stand up for myself, having been haunted by a few years of being branded a geek, so when I eventually emerged from it, my whole being burned to be popular and accepted and so I avoided any confrontation. I was never the bully, but sometimes I ignored "mean girl" behaviour from people I was dying to impress. Nowadays this won't sit with me and I'm actually far more likely to defend someone treating another badly than myself even if that means saying something uncomfortable to somebody I love.Essentially this is also a selfish behaviour as I feel restless and upset if somebody I know is behaving in a way that I feel is cruel or unfair to another.

This is not an excuse to barge into anyone's business mind you, in a busybody fashion a la half the cast of Made in Chelsea, it is merely about listening to yourself and speaking up for what you know is right. This happens at work, in our social groups and in world issues. 

Note the famous Martin Niemöller quote re: the ride of Nazism and the German intellectuals who ignored so much:


First they came for the Socialists, and I did not speak out-- Because I was not a Socialist.

Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out-- Because I was not a Trade Unionist.

Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out-- Because I was not a Jew.

Then they came for me--and there was no one left to speak for me.

God Mean Girls is so intellectual.

5) "On Wednesdays we wear pink"


Don't ever feel you should wear something just because everyone else does. With my sizeable arse, I should never have worn Bolts (that's a noughties reference - they are basically massive men's mechanic jeans which one would tie chains to) for example. Nowadays I stick to this... eg you will never see me in a drop waist dress, no matter how pretty they are... They are made for the more boyish of figure ;) 

6) "I know having a boyfriend might seem like the only thing important to you right now, but you don't have to dumb yourself down in order for a guy to like you." 


As a teenager, I really couldn't talk to men (boys!) at all, I'd simply smile and stay quiet until I'd had enough cheap white wine that I might pluck up the courage to flutter my eyelashes enough that one might tongue me for an hour before I had to catch the last train home.

I'd like to think that at the ripe old age I am now, that everyone should know this, but I'm not so sure. I couldn't act "dumb blonde" anyway these days as I'm far too loud and opinonated and I couldn't shut up enought for a man who wanted a pretty ornament.

I also often refer to this article Give it up Giggly by the talented Sam Leith in Tatler, he writes:

"They are appealing to a masculinity that finds the prospect of female independence scary. The personality she contrives to display is all about him: she's there to adore him, to be completed by him, to orbit him like a giggling pink satellite...Yet, as I say, simpering still works on feeble-minded men. So, ladies, if that's the sort of man you hope to hook, knock yourselves out." 

Personally, I don't want a feeble-minded man and I'd rather be alone forever than act dumb to score one of them.

7)  "Well, I don't know who wrote this book, but you all have got to stop calling each other sluts and whores. It just makes it ok for guys to call you sluts and whores."


I didn't comprehend the importance of this as a teenager. Calling someone a slut was a term of enderament or a jealous dig at someone who had probably had sex a couple of times when you were still a virgin. Again the all-girls boarding school didn't allow for any real "sluts".

Now I understand it as really being about the way that the entire world views women and trying to alter this with our own language. We shouldn't slut-shame or judge others or use derogatory language just because we may be having a jealous moment. If we do not know or care about the person involved then there's no need and we have no right to judge, if it is an acquaintance or god forbid a friend that we are calling this... we ought to accept that they are allowed to live their live however makes them happy even if we do not agree. And who makes you queen of the world. If they are not happy we should try to help them be happy. Walking around calling other women sluts, whores, bitches etc just affirms the ages-old female stereotypes that we work hard everyday to dispel. Think about it.

8) Don't let the haters stop you from doing your thang."


Aside from the fact that Kevin G is a complete cult figure for the mean girl generation, along with the legendary Glen Coco, this final quote could be the most important. 
Teenagers are so led by disapproval, insecurity and the crowd mentaility. You have to learn that in life, not everyone is going to approve of you or help you or like you. Accept that. There will be those who criticise and mock and sabotage, get over it and get on with your path. Don't be a hater yourself either, don't be jealous or bitter or condescending.. move forward with your own life.
There will always be mean girls in the world.. and the ones that won't change will just get older and meaner and more bitter, so just breathe and ignore. You'll get further and be happier than they ever will.